it has been 3 years since i've been able to depend on weed alcohol or other psychedelics 

and i've got to say

I don't feel any better at all

basically everything is worse nothing is as fun

I won't even bother listing stuff because it is literally everything

i've smoked a few times over the 3 years but it is not all day every day like it was the 10 years before

i've drank a few times over the 3 years but it is usually just 1 or 2 a day not a 18-30 pack a day every single day if a party 4 or 5 30 packs

it isn't easier to do anything

nothing feels healthier or stronger

it doesn't even feel better for my mental state

literally 3 years and not one thing has got better

i've always been able to clean

i've always been able to work at a job

i've always been able to exercise

money isn't better now that I don't drink or smoke in fact it's worse