I do not believe he wants anything bad to happen to me

and I would be willing to bet he wants this all to go away for me

but I do know there's something inside of him a very vocal part of him

that does want the worst for me and to hit me like I hit him, the same or worse

another aspect of the negligence the split personality disorder

the first to want to be warm and welcoming

but overwhelmed by the need to get revenge

get self-pity then start raging

slam doors get away

then try to smile and be happy

while he is just upset at the world

and torture

mental and physical

not being able to say no to jobs

having to do the jobs

usually a confession and obtaining information

always wanting to know what was going on but acting like he was too done to help or couldn't help then us just wanting to sit there never having money to do things since that was so important making too big of a deal the inability to change and the getting so much worse as time went on he wouldn't let me live I had to buy a mini fridge and cook on a hot plate in my room and stay in my room all day long he would throw my food away and I don't know where he would put it my events at youtube and twitch take very long amounts of time to set up I never had enough time to work unless he left me alone or went out of town it wouldn't be long and he would have a new job he paid me occasionally for the jobs it wasn't enough to make up for the time I lost in my youtube website and twitch development 

intimidating

just how the situation always felt specific times when he would talk bad about my mom and sister or complain about the animals

the spitting the peeing so loud 

tell your fatass little sister this this and this and this

oh and your fatass mother she need to do this and this and she owes me this and this and this it never ended

punishing someone for an act they committed or are suspected of committing

I don't know what it was but it always felt like he was doing this